


I Think I Do

by anotherjadedwriter



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Bulges and Nooks, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-19 15:32:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3615078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anotherjadedwriter/pseuds/anotherjadedwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You want to be alone. Rufioh doesn't want to be with you, and you can't keep lying that he does. You can't just keep smiling, so you close yourself in the one place no one else goes; your own hive. A least here you should be able to cry it out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Think I Do

You had, in your own slightly-addled mind, thought you found a good place to sit alone and cry. It seemed like you had, anyway. You mean, you’re in your own hive. No one comes here, not even Rufioh.

That thought makes you curl in again.

That’s, honestly, why you’re here, away from the group and Cronus’s singing and his wandering hands and the fact that Rufioh didn’t even look up when you’d leaned in to speak into Cronus’s ear. It was cruel of you to try and use him, you know, and you feel terrible over it, but you needed something to make it at least seem like you weren’t just kicking a dead hoofbeast with your relationship.

Cronus didn’t deserve to be used, you don’t deserve to be stuck in a matespritship you can’t seem to break off entirely, and now there’s someone in your hive and no one comes in your hive and you just want them to leave but they’re calling your name and you know they must have seen you come in. You really don’t have the energy to smile for them.

"Horuss?" Mituna asks, his voice surprisingly quiet. "Why’d you leave?"

You jolt when you feel two hands on your shoulders, coughing on a sob and turning your head up to meet two blank eyes set in a black and white face. “Kurloz?” The sniffle you make is gross and you hate it almost as much as you really, really hate everything else right now.

He nods, his gloved hands slipping up to undo your fogged goggles and pull them from your face. Mituna, you note blankly, still staring at Kurloz as he works on undoing your hair, has settled into your little pile and is shakily tugging your jacket open. Your eyes squeeze shut when Kurloz leans in, his stitches pressing to your forehead in a kiss, and Mituna’s hands slide under your jacket at last.

"Shh." Mituna’s voice is low, soothing in a strange way, even with it jumping between whisper and normal speaking tone. "We don’t want you to cry anymore. Just wanna help, Horuss."

Kurloz hums an affirmative noise, gently leading you forward and settling in behind you. He finishes stripping your coat off, setting it gently on the floor. You lean back into him when he pulls, waiting for a camera or something because this is ridiculous. Why would either of them care?

Mituna catches your attention with a sloppy kiss on the corner of your mouth. “Talk.”

You stay quiet, a while, and they both let you. Kurloz rubs his fingers, gloveless now, over your scalp, your hornbeds and neck, just soothing you into nothing, and Mituna, he’s in your lap, petting your face, your chest, his lips pressing kind of messy, nice kisses to your own. They both slow their actions when you start to talk.

It’s nothing terribly coherent, just you whimpering that you don’t think your matesprit actually wants to be with you, and they listen. When you break into another set of sobs, Kurloz wraps you up tight with his arms around your chest and Mituna wipes your tears away, frowning something awful under his messy hair.

"Shoosh, Hor-russ." He stumbles, petting your cheek when you hiccup in response. "Shoosh. It h-hurts. But we got you. You’re not alone."

You sniffle again, whine, and cling to him, babbling that he’s only interested in you sometimes, and even then only for sex. That you really, honestly love him. Still. That you can’t smile all the damn time anymore, it hurts, and that you hate yourself so much for it, because you can’t be happy and you’re not enough for Rufioh and you want so badly to be able to be friends with Damara but you can’t stop being “the other troll” for her and that all of it makes it feel like your chest is collapsing.

They rock you forward, back, forward again, keeping a smooth rhythm and petting you, Mituna crooning wordlessly and Kurloz starting a purr in his chest that feels good against your back. You keep crying, uselessly, shaking all over and sobbing and probably getting snot and drool on Mituna’s shoulder but he keeps you pressed there with gentle, insistent hands. He’s speaking, telling you that you’re so, so good enough. That it isn’t you. Rufioh, he says, should at least discuss anything like that he might need in a relationship, that you shouldn’t be carrying it all. His voice shakes, cracks, bounces from soft to almost too loud to have against your ear, and he stutters as he speaks, but it still soothes you.

That, and their hands. Kurloz is touching more, you assume he’s just making up for not speaking, but he’s touching and petting and keeping you slack and sobbing and gross between them. You almost want to move away, almost want to lock yourself in a room alone so no one sees you all sloppy and your hair all undone and brushed over a shoulder so Kurloz can press little tiny kisses to your skin, but you stay, soaking up the attention they give you like they’re gonna run away at any second, or like someone is about to burst in and say it was all a joke, all for fun.

No one else comes in. Kurloz, at some point, convinces Mituna to stop laying all over you (you whine when he pulls away, your arms outstretched and needy) so he can turn you sideways in his lap and pet your cheek, eyes on yours. You watch, transfixed, as his eyes start to glow indigo.

"Motherfucker." His voice doesn’t boom so much as just, echo, like he’s calling from far away. It’s warped, not like when he could still talk with his mouth, and it makes you kind of sad that he can’t remember how he sounded enough to replicate it. "Let us take you."

Your face flushes, but he presses his fingers to your lips before you respond.

"Just wanna make you feel good, for once." His voice wraps around you, almost physical, soothing and soft and warm, but then you realize the feeling is more Mituna than anything, his arms circling you and his face pressing to your chest like he’s wanted to touch you for a while. "Nothin you ain’t want. Just pettin."

You’re aware of his voodoos leaving, and his eyes settle back to the white-filmed yellow and indigo they usually are before you speak, your voice weak. “Why?” You jump when Mituna pets your cheek again.

"Cuz we like you." He murmurs, voice a little slurred. "Nd we don’t wanna see you sad."

Before you can ask “like me  _how_?”, Mituna presses closer to you, kissing you with just the tiniest amount of pressure, his hands petting through your hair, and you shiver. He’s being so gentle, like you’re going to shatter, and it feels like you might. He pulls away and pets you more, kisses your forehead and cheek and all over your face, and Kurloz is just curled against your back, but he does tilt your head to kiss you himself. You whimper, trying to push yourself against both of them, and they keep soothing you, pressing kisses everywhere as they ease you out of your shirt.

Mituna presses his lips to yours again, then, just as gentle as before, but when you push back he cups your jaw and the back of your head, tilting his own to get closer, his tongue flicking over your lip once. You open your mouth and do your best not to cling to him, gripping his suit and feeling like he’s pouring heat and pleasure into you, even before he presses his knee to your sheathe. Kurloz’s hands toy with your grubscars, stroke your sides, and run up and down your spine.

You both pull away gasping, and you moan a little when Mituna’s hand rests on your thigh, because you want him to keep touching you. His voice is still gentle, not demanding anything from you. “Wanna keep going? We can, c’n just do this.” With how he’s seated half on your lap, you can feel his nook through his suit.

"I, yeah. Yes. I want this." You murmur, flushing. You want them to keep touching you like you’re breakable. Kurloz’s pets reach your neck, working every bit of tenseness from them, and you roll your head back to look at him, catching him smiling to himself. "I want you both to keep being here. With me."

Kurloz tucks your shoulder over his chin, purring a low sound while Mituna lays against you, hands resting at your waist, picking at the hem of your jeans. “D’you wanna pail?” His lips touch your ear when he says it, but he’s only asking, and you get the feeling that he’d be fine either way.

"Yes." You murmur, your face flushing and your ears turning down as you hide your face in Mituna’s neck. "Please, yes, please."

He kisses your horn, pressing you back against Kurloz’s chest with hands on your shoulders. “Both of us?” He’s still smiling, leaning close enough that his nose actually touches your own.

"Yes, please." You purr, pulling him in and kissing him. Kurloz chuckles behind you, his hands pushing your pants lower. You break contact with Mituna to help him get them off, and Mituna leans away to unzip his suit, and you take a second to speak. "H-how are we going to do this?"

Mituna shrugs out of the arms of his suit, rolling it off his fingers and then patting your cheek with his bare hand. You think he’s going to answer you, but he just shrugs again, shaking his hair out of his eyes, and then Kurloz is grinding his hips into your ass, nose pressed tight under your jaw, so you just drop it. You can figure it out as you go, you guess. It isn’t like you need to know  _right now_  exactly what’ll happen.

You moan, softly, as your bulge unsheathes against Kurloz’s hand, your nook already slick. He kisses your neck as best he can, these little fluttery things, and pets his other hand down your chest while he presses two fingers into your nook. Mituna licks his lips, leaning in to kiss your chest, his teeth scraping but never breaking the skin. He pulls a mark up at your neck, teeth sinking in enough to almost bruise and lips and tongue soothing it.

Kurloz has his fingers crooked just enough to barely brush a spot that makes your hips rock up to meet him, and once Mituna finishes undressing and climbs back into your lap, his bulge wraps around yours. His bulge has a little split probably two inches from the tip, so it forks, and you chirp as both of them twist around your bulge. Kurloz makes a little grumbling sort of noise and you make yourself focus, thinking past all the stimulation because Mituna is kissing you like he can’t really get enough and Kurloz has another finger in you (thank god for lanky clowns), but he’s also grinding into you.

The way he’s pressed up against you lets you feel every curve of his bulge, trapped in fabric, and you can only manage a needy (gross) keen, your head falling on his shoulder and your legs pushing wide. He makes that grumble again, his hands coming back from petting through your hair and fingering your nook to shove his pants down, and you close a hand around Mituna’s bulge, where it’s wrapped with your own, stroking them both together.

He croons, hips bucking erratically, and you sigh in relief when Kurloz’s bulge finally starts to press into you, your free hand moving to his hip. Mituna pulls away, then, and you whine, but he’s got both your hands in his (which is really kid of gross, with the lubrication your bulges have both been making all over one of them), and you shiver as he lifts himself enough to lead your bulge to his nook. He makes this shivery, wobbling noise as your bulge pushes into him, little by little, and you repeat it back to him, wishing selfishly that Kurloz hadn’t stitched his mouth shut so you could kiss him.

You nook aches. It stings, and you can feel Kurloz holding back. You wish he’d push forward, you want everything, and you keep making cloying sounds for him, turning your head to drag your tongue over his throat when he cups the back of your head. Mituna is hovering, taking his time and using a hand on your chest to steady himself, almost painfully hot around your bulge. Everything is perfect, totally perfect, and then Mituna moans something that sounds halfway like your name and Kurloz presses in another centimeter and kisses you and you’re crying again.

Your whole body is shaking, there are tears running down your cheeks and you’re probably getting sweaty and snotty but it’s so much. It’s just, so much for you to take in, and they’re both worrying, petting you and promising not to try this again, saying that they’re gonna stop and you just sob again, pulling Mituna back when he pulls away a little.

"N-no, please, I don’t want to stop. I don’t. I want you to stay, I’m just, happy." You sniffle, choke back a moan as Kurloz shifts a little. "I’m happy. Please."

Kurloz carefully wipes your face, kissing your cheek with his stitches, and you smile, still sniffling but good, it’s all good. Mituna kisses your forehead. “Love you, ‘Russ.”

You keep sniffling as they move, your noises sounding less like words and more like the kind of things you can’t consciously control, just sounds, moans and whimpers and tiny, tiny mumbles that you love them too, you think, you’re willing to try because you’re okay with everything, you’re happy and you want to stay near them and that feels like love so you think it’s true.

Kurloz seats himself in you with a muffled groan, his claws scratching at your hip when he grinds up. Mituna sighs this funny noise, going loose-limbed against your chest as he settles in your lap, your bulge coiled tight in his nook and swallowed by heat. You can’t hope to last long, and you try to babble an apology, but they just pet you, moving with you slow and gentle and letting you just kind of squirm between them, your skin hot and your body wound tight.

The noises in your throat are high and reedy, and Mituna’s are surprisingly soft, mostly little chirps or mewls, Kurloz’s lips are against your neck and you feel the growls he’s making, his hand sliding down to rub a thumb over the base of your bulge, slick with prematerial. Your thighs shake, your whole lower body is shivering and you nook is fluttering, trying to pull Kurloz in deeper, and then you sob a moan, your body going tight before lax, halfway to convulsing, and you try to ask for a pail. Mituna laughs, soft, not unkind, and kisses you, rocking his hips and pushing your bulge in as far as he can.

You keen, shudder, and come, finally, your nook fluttering around Kurloz and your bulge pouring material into Mituna, arms locking tight around him because he’s easier to grab, and Kurloz wraps you up against himself, both of you, panting in your ear. Mituna mumbles something you don’t catch and then goes stock-still, his back getting tight in an arch against your chest and his hand jerkily stroking his bulge as he starts to come. You notice, vaguely, that he’s mostly just rubbing his thumb in the fork of his bulge, and make a reminder to do that yourself at some point.

For now, though, you’re mumbling barely-intelligible phrases to Kurloz, asking him to keep going, to finish, your head turned to kiss at his face where it’s pressed into your neck. Mituna slides gingerly off your lap, letting your bulge sort of flop back between your thighs before it starts to retract. Kurloz makes an almost pained noise when he comes, the tip of his bulge pressing hard on the oversensitive opening of your seedflap and the flood of cold material making you click, hips jerking. Your seedflap opens and you almost come again, everything going white-hot and perfect.

Kurloz doesn’t make any move to take you off his lap, though he does turn to the side to lay you down. You purr a bit, feeling fuzzy and dumb and warm all over, and Mituna wraps his body around yours, kisses your face and then Kurloz’s and then yours again, his hands all over you both while Kurloz repeats it, kissing your hair and shoulders before kissing Mituna, his cheeks or horns or eyelids, and you feel so warm, it’s all so good.

"I love you both.." You murmur, dozy. "I think I do."

They both kiss you, telling you they’re pretty sure they love you too and encouraging you to sleep. You don’t even care that you’re gonna be sticky and sore when you wake up, or that you’ll have to explain this to Rufioh at some point, because right now, you’re very possibly in love with two trolls who cradle you between them like you’re made of spun glass and Mituna is snoring in his sleep and Kurloz is humming some kind of lullaby and everything is great.

**Author's Note:**

> I swear to god this was gonna be sfw at first.  
> if you enjoyed this, consider tipping me here: https://ko-fi.com/A781PZJ


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